Ode to a French Pastry

IrishCream · Post by **IrishCream** » Sat Mar 14, 2009 11:12 am

French Biscuit opens a door that has a sign saying "Free Anime Giveaway" on the front. She sees a pitch black room and is reluctant to enter. However, it is free anime...

Don't be alarmed by the darkness that is mi casa, for it is now su casa as well. Here, let me sooth your fears by lighting a candle*. I'm sorry, did that act slightly disgust you? I'm sensitive to such emotions, for I can sense the disdain in your person and see the vomit on the floor. Worry not, for if that did not set the mood, perhaps some music will do the trick.

...Hmmm

I see that your clothes are still on. Maybe this is more up your alley.

...Hmmm

Well I tried my best. Anyway, that can't stop us from enjoying a delicious meal. I worked tirelessly to make sure this was the perfect dinner.

It takes over 35 minutes to cook in the microwave. I made it to show my dedication to our love. I'm sure you've already noticed that the door behind you is locked. It's good to see that you've made sure that even if you came down with a momentary case of insanity you wouldn't be able to leave and call the local authorities. You, my dear, are a delight! Before we dine on delicious radiation cuisine, let me give you a tour de force of my new castle. I moved out of the old one due to...unfortunate circumstances. Worry not about the scars covering my face; I'm not suicidal or anything, those are just from glass shards.

Oh, I do believe we've stumbled upon my "game room"!

As you can tell, I'm into the age old arts of "naughty". Rowr! Behave yourself for just a moment as we continue on. I assure you, we'll be returning to THAT particular room 30 minutes after diner, so as not to cramp up.

Opens basement door

"Please sir, may we eat this week?"

YOU'LL EAT WHEN I GET THAT THESIS PAPER FOR MY PSYCHOLOGY FINAL! AND IF ONE MORE OF YOU DROPS DEAD FROM MALNUTRITION, I'M REALLY GONNA GET ANGRY!

Slams door shut

*Sigh* I'm not even taking any classes...

I apologize for their retched odor. They bathe in their own filth, unfortunately. I wanted to show you my work room, but those children are so lazy I'm afraid hardly any work gets done around here! Hah! HAH HAH! Ah, jokes do so tickle my fancy. Speaking of tickling my fancy, if you'll follow me to the big screen that plays hardcore animal porn 24/7...

Banging on the door

Oh my word, will they ever give up? I'm sorry, but a rival company has been trying to lure my employees to work for them.

"THIS IS THE FBI! OPEN THE DOOR AND SURRENDER THE CHILDREN OR WE WILL BUST THIS DOOR DOWN AND STOMP YOUR SORRY ASS!"

Exit, stage left!

*Editors note: that isn't me in the video, in case you were curious. I don't possess such awesome talent.

The French Biscuit · Post by **The French Biscuit** » Sat Mar 14, 2009 12:30 pm

*wants Irish in such a bad way right now*

You had me at the DBZ theme music.

IrishCream · Post by **IrishCream** » Sat Mar 14, 2009 12:43 pm

Papa knows what you like

ChimeraCreative · Post by **ChimeraCreative** » Sat Mar 14, 2009 12:46 pm

:smilielol5::smilielol5:

He's mine, Biscuit, mine!

What does Irish do that he can afford a castle to smuggle stuff into? ^_^

Fasheem · Post by **Fasheem** » Sat Mar 14, 2009 8:04 pm

What a gentleman, leaving Biscy alone to deal with the cops herself! Class, class all the way.

"Is this your anime, ma'am? You're going to have to come with us."

IrishCream · Post by **IrishCream** » Sun Mar 15, 2009 12:43 am

She's happy. What else matters?

CountD · Post by **CountD** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:34 pm

On the streets, only survival matters.

CountD · Post by **CountD** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:35 pm

it's a nasty world out there.

CountD · Post by **CountD** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:36 pm

The French Biscuit · Post by **The French Biscuit** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:39 pm

Fasheem wrote:What a gentleman, leaving Biscy alone to deal with the cops herself! Class, class all the way.

"Is this your anime, ma'am? You're going to have to come with us."

I can take them.

I have my trusty Flaming Croissants of DOOM!

and I'm too cute for prison.

The French Biscuit · Post by **The French Biscuit** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:41 pm

IrishCream wrote:Papa knows what you like

The French Biscuit · Post by **The French Biscuit** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:43 pm

ChimeraCreative wrote::smilielol5::smilielol5:

He's mine, Biscuit, mine!

There's only one way to settle this!

Mud wrestling.

ChimeraCreative · Post by **ChimeraCreative** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:43 pm

The French Biscuit wrote:I can take them.

I have my trusty Flaming Croissants of DOOM!

and I'm too cute for prison.

In the Frolic thread on the temporary board I refer to you as Intergalactic Scone. It's kinda catchy. ^_^

The French Biscuit · Post by **The French Biscuit** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:44 pm

ChimeraCreative wrote:In the Frolic thread on the temporary board I refer to you as Intergalactic Scone. It's kinda catchy. ^_^

I think I like that alot.

*exalts CC on the temp board*

IrishCream · Post by **IrishCream** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 6:47 pm

The French Biscuit wrote:

I'm SO in...

Mr Wallstreet · Post by **Mr Wallstreet** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 8:07 pm

IrishCream wrote:
Don't be alarmed by the darkness that is mi casa, for it is now su casa as well. Here, let me sooth your fears by lighting a candle*. I'm sorry, did that act slightly disgust you? I'm sensitive to such emotions, for I can sense the disdain in your person and see the vomit on the floor. Worry not, for if that did not set the mood, perhaps some music will do the trick.

...Hmmm

I see that your clothes are still on. Maybe this is more up your alley.

...Hmmm

Well I tried my best. Anyway, that can't stop us from enjoying a delicious meal. I worked tirelessly to make sure this was the perfect dinner.

Is it just me or does Irish sound suspiciously like this guy:

Tragic Angelus · Post by **Tragic Angelus** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 8:49 pm

Isn't that what Kid said the last time he did this?

IrishCream · Post by **IrishCream** » Mon Mar 16, 2009 8:58 pm

Yeah, he did. And I kinda do have the continental in mind, but in my version I'm not wearing pants. EVER!

Mr Wallstreet · Post by **Mr Wallstreet** » Tue Mar 17, 2009 7:00 am

But...But you have nothing to show.

IrishCream · Post by **IrishCream** » Tue Mar 17, 2009 10:02 am

You may not see it, but you'll definitely feel it...in your guts!